About Me

I feel the wanderlust and the call of the open highway. Which is good, because I drive cars for a living. But I'm a writer, and someday hope to once again make my living using my writing skills.

Sunday, June 12, 2011


I had to stay overnight in Chicago to pick up a car this weekend. I decided to go and see the new Woody Allen movie MIDNIGHT IN PARIS, mostly because I knew it was a movie none of my friends would ever see. When I do get a chance to go with friends, I save more mainstream fare like SUPER 8 and GREEN LANTERN.

The movie was playing in two auditoriums at this huge multiplex, and I was lucky enough to arrive five minutes before the first one was to begin. The other one wouldn't start for another hour and a half. The movie was pretty amusing, though I still prefer Woody's earlier, funny films.

Near the climax of the movie, I heard a voice shouting loudly, "Sue! Sue!" At first I thought it was on the soundtrack, part of the movie. But it didn't fit at all with what was happening on the screen. "Sue! Sue!" I looked around and saw that there was a man standing down under the movie screen shouting. "Sue! Sue!"

I kept on thinking to myself, "Just ignore it, he's one of Bill's people, but you're enjoying a movie, so don't engage."

"Sue! Where are you?"

The problem is that I knew what the trouble was and how to solve it. So I could fix this or I could sit and here him bellow for the rest of the movie. He was obviously in the wrong auditorium, and was looking for Sue who was in the other theater showing this movie.


I got up and ran down to the front. As I got near to him, I could see that he was an elderly man, and was holding a large popcorn and large soda. I stepped up slowly to him, approaching cautiously. "Excuse me, sir."

"Sue?" He dropped his soda, which hit the floor and splashed up onto my legs. He used his free hand to feel for me, and soon was running his hand over my face the way a blind person might feel your facial features.

"Sir, my name is Bill, and I can help you. Come with me."

"Where is Sue?"

"I'm going to take you to her."

"You know where Sue is?"

"Yes sir, just follow me."

As we started down the hallway to the door, three girls from India entered the hallway from the lobby. Seeing that they all had full containers of popcorn and soda, I assumed they were also in the wrong place.

"They aren't Sue," the old man said with an accusatory tone.

"Ladies, I think you may be in the wrong theater."

"This is MIDNIGHT IN PARIS, isn't it?" one of them asked. It was her accent that made me think they were from India, very distinctive.

"Yes, but this showing is almost over. I'm showing this man to the other theater, if you'd care to follow."

"And why should we believe you? We don't even know you. This could be some kind of a trick."

"Suit yourselves, I was just trying to help."

The girls huddled for a whispering conference. "We have decided that we will come with you."

"Where in the hell is Sue, dammit?!"

They all followed me out into the lobby, then I led them down two hallways until I saw the sign for their movie. I pointed and said, "There it is, right there. That's the theater you want."

The old man squinted. "That sign says PARIS. I want Sue."

"That's where the movie MIDNIGHT IN PARIS is starting right now."

"Is Sue in there?"

"Yes, Sue will be there."

The old man started moving as fast as he could shuffle, calling out, "Sue! I'm coming!"

The girls conferred with each other again, then one of them said, "We are going to trust you. This time." They walked off with their noses in the air.

I went back into my theater just in time to see the closing credits. Does anyone know how MIDNIGHT IN PARIS ends?

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